This Saturday, August 4th, it will have been 3 months since I quit “working”. (i.e. reporting daily to a geo-location and pitching in to make those coordinates produce money). Since then, I have produced NO money. Zero dollars, zero cents. Unless you count the $20 I got (in a Cub Foods parking lot at 10pm on a Tuesday night; sounds lurid, right?) for selling an unused All-in-one HP printer that was collecting dust and using prime shelf space. Oh, okay…yesterday I also received a $5 refund for a glass pie-plate returned to Crossroads Deli. Shoulda been $10, but neither location of Lunds & Byerlys wanted the other pie plate which I am sure came from one of their stores, but they were naysaying so I kept the damn thing. Truthfully, I’ve had it for years. Since sometime before April 2015 when they finally merged the two store names into one new clunky co-name. Back when I presumably purchased a pie from them, it was just Byerlys. Stuffy old ladies shopped Lunds; definitely NOT cool chicks like me.
For my next act: $1 for notary service. Ka-Ching!! Turns out, making money isn’t so difficult after all. Whoa Nellie…better slow my pace a bit. Don’t want to end up in a higher tax bracket.
You may wonder: What ELSE has she been doing since “retiring”? (As people keep saying about me, but which I never say about myself). Truth is, I’ve been touring clinics. Lots and lots of clinics. I can state with authority that Park Nicollet clinics have fallen behind in their décor to Allina clinics, which you’d think would equate to lower costs for clinic visits, but you’d be wrong. No. That is not how it works. Another thing I’ve noticed: Eye doctors have the most unusual, generally modern, art on their walls. Makes a kind of sense. Whether your vision is good or bad, the art sort of looks the same. Abstract, blurry, wavy lines, splotchy or blocky. Turn your head this way and that like a dog seeing something he can’t quite understand. With all these clinic visits comes phone calls and paperwork and follow-ups and “How did we do?” surveys – For the record: I LOATHE SURVEYS. Add to that paperwork for banking, taxes, Medical Assistance, Elderly Waiver, Jury Duty Summons, hospice, IRS inquiry, home refinance, therapists, supplemental insurance, pharmacies (x3). I keep busy.
I’ve done “some” yard work, “some” house work, “some” craft work, and last, and certainly least, “some” kitchen work. Somehow, I expected to magically become enamored with planning meals and making food from scratch. In my mind’s eye, I wear an apron, look up healthy recipes online, shop efficiently and make batches of marvelous dishes to be consumed and enjoyed daily with preserved leftovers for those extra busy days when I don’t have time to cook. HaHaHaHa! Go ahead, laugh with me. I am describing someone who is NOT AT ALL like Me in any way. That person does exist, but she doesn’t live here and I’ve never met her.
Periodically, I spend a little time doing ‘self-care’. That’s the frou-frou term these days for taking a break and indulging in a bubble bath, a much needed nap, or just sitting idly while the clock tick tick ticks. I am not very good at these things. Oh, the guilt. Inconsistent would be the best way to describe my efforts. But on the upside, I have managed to spend a lot of time with my parents. Dad had a close call early in July, but he is out of the woods now. I feel that I have gotten to know my Mom a bit better and understand what her day to day rhythm is like and how stressed she must have been before my daily visits. I’m so thankful for having the opportunity to slow my own pace in order to relieve her of some chores and responsibilities. She has done enough work now.
Today is her 79th birthday. We went to the Arboretum, to Joann’s Fabrics for yarn and to lunch at QCumbers. She had a wonderful time and so did I. That would not have happened if I had been “at work”.
In between, I’ve managed to knit a sweater. Almost. Should have been done weeks ago. Let’s just say, I’m learning a lot on this one. It is registered to go to the MN State Fair for competition but it’s not complete. The panic is beginning to cause a bit of fear sweat. (That aroma is unmistakable) I can do this. I know I can. I will do it.
AS WOOL IS MY BOND: This sweater will be delivered to the Fair if I have to block it and dry it in the car, pinned to the passenger seat, windows down, on the way, to the fairgrounds. That’s the patented “KB Way”. So let it be written. So let it be done. kb.xo